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Stresshead

It’s been a while, with teething and returning to work, finding time to get online whilst having the brain power to do anything cohesive has been tough. This post was actually written a couple of months ago and just needed checking, so finally, here it is, partially inspired by listening today to my very pregnant and arguably even more stressy friend worrying about cleaning her 3 bathrooms in between cooking separate meals for her now quite fussy 1.5yr old whilst working and moving/decorating a new house (my life now feels like a bastion of calm!):

Some people who know me (and have seen the state of my house) may be surprised to hear that one of my biggest flaws is my sense of perfectionism.

Sadly the way this manifests is as follows:

  1. Job needs doing.
  2. I just about have time to do it quickly but badly.
  3. I get distracted seeing the other jobs that I need to do, but don’t have time for.
  4. I give up and don’t bother doing anything.

I.e. If I can’t do it perfectly I don’t bother at all.

The problem with having a baby is that there’s never really enough time to do anything, which leads to me fixating on all the stuff I ought to do (rather than acknowledging what I actually have done) then going into meltdown mode and becoming totally incompetent. At which point my very chilled husband has to mop up the puddle of overtired, hormonal emotion that I’ve become, reassure me that I’m not utterly useless, and tell me to chill out a bit and try not to do so much, just prioritise the things that have to be done, or that will leave me less stressed after, rather than trying to do everything. Of course trying to prioritise does lead me to consider all the things that need to be done and the positive feedback process begins again :/

As this is clearly both ridiculous and a recipe for a nervous breakdown I’ve decided things need to change.

Based on the last few week’s experience, these will include:

  • Feeling guilty when Little Miss picks raisins etc off the floor and if I haven’t cleaned her toys every few days, considering that I’ll put them back to find her chewing on one of the cat’s toys that they’ve dragged back in from the conservatory. Then licking the bottom of my shoes. Ewwwwww.
  • Sweeping and mopping the floors to a pristine level, only to have dad and baby eat their lunch of crumby toast, yoghurt and sticky, squadgy satsuma all over it. After 3 consecutive days of this I feel it’s time to put the mop away for a few days.
  • Panicking if I’m not creating varied, wholesome meals each night when all Madam is interested in is eating said raisins off the floor. And maybe a bit of mash and kitkat round at Grandad’s. And pumice stone (Apparently. I blame bathtime with daddy for this one!)
  • Going out of my way to include Missie in the wonderful sensory world of cooking when she gets upset because she’s chomped on a clove of raw garlic, then gives us arguably our worst night since (or maybe including) the newborn stage because of tummy ache after  she’s scoffed fistfulls of raw rice before I can stop her. Although she did deal very well with the spoonful of mustard she chomped on at the end of dinner tonight.

So these are my new stress-less not-quite-resolutions. We’ll see if they’ll work!

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This entry was posted on 23/02/2013 by in Uncategorized.
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